This will definitely be a short post today. I've sort of been progressively getting worse. I don't sound as bad as I did earlier but now my neck is hurting.
I made it into work today and sort of felt like an a** because I was hacking at my cube. But I did feel decent honestly but I still can't help think there might have been people near me wondering why I came.
But it was the first day since the holiday and I figured I might be able to get some answers on projects I'm assigned. Still a bit of a cluster but working at it. I definitely had a moment of 'this job sucks' and it's mostly because I feel inadequate. It's a new job for me and I'm still learning. I have a couple projects that are just really ensuring I'm learning, lol, I guess that's the nice way to put it. When I think I'm on top of something I discover 'nope... not quite.' It also took me, and I'm still not finished, a minute to start up on a test run for something that will be due on Friday. Sometimes I get so lethargic plus being sick I just had to keep staring at the examples and directions for 10 minutes, then would forget what I was doing or would wander away and do something else. In short, not very focused or if I was they occurred in tiny burst.
One good thing about today is I had some ideas in regards to stories I'm working on. The bad news is I was so out of it that I forgot to write 'em down. I'm sure they'll hit me again once I sit down to write tonight (since I have to get in my daily 100).
I was unusually anxious about my niece today at work too. I get worried easily. So seeing her when I got in was good plus she called me because her and my mom were watching for me to get in. She told me if I didn't get in soon I wouldn't get my surprise gift she got me -_-
I hate that feeling where you think you're on top of things at work and then it all falls apart. Especially when you're new to the job. One of the reasons why I haven't applied for anything new in a long time. You have my sympathies. Sorry about being sick as well. Hopefully taking a bit of a rest will have you feeling better soon.
ReplyDeleteIt keeps me on my toes at least but I do miss the feeling of being 'good at what I do' and just tackling changes as the expert. And hopefully I'll get a bit more rest this weekend. My nostrils keep alternating between which will allow me to breathe -_-
DeleteI had the same problem this evening of having a thought then losing it before I could get it down! It was an important one about revision later this year too, and ironically I lost it because I was writing at the time and didn't pause to note it. Go figure. I hope you got yours back!
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